Tag Archives: influencing people

Top Sales Questions – Shelle’s Top Tips – Shelle Rose Charvet

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If you’re a salesperson, there are five questions that will let you know exactly what your customer wants, what they don’t want, and how to propose and position what it is you have to offer.

If you’re not a salesperson these questions will be useful every time you really need to understand what’s important to someone.

So here they are.

Questions #1 & 2 – What Do You Want? and What’s Important To You?

Many salespeople just forget to ask these questions.  A while ago, I went to buy a new luxury car. I decided to abandon my old mommy-mobile and get a new car for me. My kids were grown up.  It’s my turn for a beautiful luxury car.  We went to seven dealerships.

Out of those seven dealerships only one salesperson said, “Shelle, what do you want? What’s important to you about this car?” How are you going to position anything to me or show me a car, for example, if you don’t know that one of the things that’s important to me is that when I drive my new luxury car up to my prospective client’s place of business that they’d be impressed by my new car.

Now, I know that sounds superficial but that’s one of the things that was important to me.

I felt a little bit sorry for one of the younger salespersons and I said to him, “You didn’t ask me what was important to me.” Okay, he got a little defensive. I would have gotten defensive too. He said, “Well, I tried to find it out in the conversation. I think I did okay.” I said, “Oh, really? So what do I want? What’s important to me?” and he didn’t know.

Now, all of those salespeople asked me, “What car are you presently driving?” I said, “I don’t want to talk about it.” So it’s hidden in the back somewhere.

Write down what they say because the words the customer uses are the words that have a resonance for them.

If you want more information on Top Sales Questions and how to use them, check out my
Sales Booster Package – Increase Sales, Marketing & Customer Retention »

Question #3: Why Is That Important?

 Here what we’re trying to find out is one of the important motivations for you. Is the person trying to achieve or gain something from that or are they trying to prevent or solve a problem?

So if you say, “Shelle, why is it important for you to impress your customers?” I might say, “Because I want to feel successful” or “Because I want to look successful.” Those are things I want to gain. The Toward trigger.

Or I might say, “Well, I don’t want to look like I’m not successful,” and that would be moving Away From, and you may have heard me say this before, the trigger that’s moving away from what I don’t want.

This gives you an indication of how to speak to your customer. Either you show them what they’ll gain, this will enable you to look more successful with your customers, or what they’re trying to avoid. This way you won’t look like you’re unsuccessful with your customers.

Question #4 – How Will You Know if You’ve Made The Right Decision?

 “Excellent question,” you say.  With this question you’re trying to find out does the person decide for themselves, by their own criteria and their own judgments and we call that Internal or did they decide based on outside criteria or outside influences?  

“So Shelle, how will you know you’ve made the right decision about your car?” Shelle might say, “When it feels good. When I’m behind the wheel and I love it.” Well, that’s clearly Internal. So although I did seem to have some external influences, I know I’ve made the right decision myself.

Now, I could have answered the question, “Shelle, how will you know if you’ve made the right decision?” by saying, “When all those people I’m driving by smile at me and look like they’re impressed.” That’s more External.

So this gives you more information about what’s going to help that person decide or buy.

Question #5 – Why Did You Choose To Look For A Car Now?

The question, “Why did you choose..?” is going to give you two kinds of answers.

If the person gives you a list of reasons: an old car was rotten; I want a new car; I want something that fits me; as a salesperson you need to talk to them about all of the options that the car you are selling comes with.

If they don’t tell you why but instead they tell you the story of how it happened that they ended up needing a car, so for example, they’ll say, “Well, my old car broke down for the last time and it was going to cost a lot of money to fix it. So then I realized it probably wasn’t worth my while to fix it so I ended up having to look for a new car.” If they give you one of these stories that has all these events in it, they’re not so interested in all of the options with the car. They want to know how does it work and what do you have to do to buy it, what are the steps in the buying process.

So those are the top sales questions. What do you want? What’s important to you? Why is that important? How you know you made the right decision? And why did you choose to look for or to search for this thing now?

If you want more information on Top Sales Questions and how to use them, check out my
Sales Booster Package – Increase Sales, Marketing & Customer Retention »

For more “Shelle’s Top Tips” visit
http://www.ShellesTopTips.com »

I’d love to hear your feedback.  How was this article useful to you?  You can leave a comment below or message me directly at shelle@wordsthatchangeminds.com

Hope to hear from you.

Cheers,
Shelle

Overcommitting – Shelle’s Top Tips

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Today, our topic is overcommitting. What do you do once you have enthusiastically jumped in and said yes and then you realize you have no time?

The first things I’m going to look at are prevention strategies, and then some tips for how to cure it, how to get out of the commitment once you have made the commitment.

Prevention

Prevention is a question of calming down and breathing. Lots of people are going to come to you and say, “Hey, Shelle, we’ve got this great idea that we would like to get you involved in.” Instead of saying, “Really? Yes I’ll do it!” breathe. Ask questions:

“Tell me more.”

“What does it entail?”

Take some notes and make sure you thoroughly understand what the person is asking you to do.

Once you’ve had all your questions answered, I suggest you say,

“You know what? I’m going to check with my other commitments to see if I can fit that in. Let me get back to you,” and then let them know when you can get back to them.

Breathe, stay calm, ask questions, and promise that you will check it out with your other commitments. The other person will know that you are taking them seriously. You’re weighing whether or not you have time to do it properly and then promise to get back to them. This gives you the opportunity to see whether or not it will be an over commitment.

The Cure

You’ve said yes. What do you do? First, as soon as possible, you need to do something. Don’t wait. Don’t hide. Don’t chew your fingernails in anxiety. Do something as soon as possible, as soon as you realized you’ve overcommitted.

Secondly, what do you do? Apologize. Use the Bad News Formula. Check out my Shelle’s Top Tips on apologizing and the Bad News Formula for exact instructions on each of these.

Lastly, offer the other person something. You’ve let them down, maybe you can help them find a replacement for you or perhaps there is a part of the task that you can do that will help them out. Find something that you can do and remember to think about this before you speak to them. I suggest you do this on the phone or in person rather than by email. It will go over much better and keep your relationship in good form.

For more tips on how to get out of those sticky communication situations, check out my book, The Customer is Bothering Me. It’s also an e-book that you can download and it’s got lots of hints and tips for difficult communication situations.

To enquire about booking me for a speaking engagement, please click here.

Dealing with Temptation – Shelle’s Top Tips

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Oscar Wilde said, “The only thing to do with temptation is to yield to it”, but I believe there’s another option. So here you are, it’s holiday time, the table is laden with all of your favorite foods, some of which you may have even cooked yourself, (talking about myself here again).

You really want to dive in and all you can see is that lovely delicious stuff and you can practically taste it on your tongue before you’ve eaten it. How are you not going to just yield to it as Oscar Wilde said?

When you’re in the store, or you are behind at work and you know you need to be saving money but you really want those things right in front of you. What do you do if you’re on line doing the same thing?

Click here to watch the videoclip

Here are a couple of tips.

First, breathe deeply. Breathe deeply a couple of times because you end up giving in to temptation when you act on it really quickly. If you stand back and give yourself a couple of moments to think, that can be the secret to your success.

Second, after you’ve breathed, go away from the temptation. I go into the bathroom. I sit on the toilet. (that maybe too much information). But I remember while I’m sitting on the toilet what my real goal is here. Am I working towards becoming a better person? Am I trying to lose weight? Am I getting into shape? What do I really want? Get back in touch with what is really important.

If you haven’t ever talked to yourself about what’s really important, you might want to do that before you confront the holiday temptations.

The third suggestion for resisting temptation is to go have a glass of water and think about something else. The moment will pass and that’s really, really key.

Temptation only ever happens in the moment. So if you have a couple of tips for how to forget what’s going on in front of you and think about something else, timing off to reconnect with what’s important to you, that’s going to help you with all kinds of temptations whether it’s buying, eating, or anything else you can think of.

I hope these tips. Have a look at other Shelle’s Top Tips and enjoy the holidays.
http://www.ShellesTopTips.com

If you are interested in booking me (Shelle Rose Charvet) for a presentation, keynote or workshop contact me at shelle@wordsthatchangeminds.com. Please visit my speaking page too.

Get Someone to do What you Want – Shelle’s Top Tips


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A lot of people tell me that getting others to do what you want them to do can be very difficult at times.

So here’s three tips on how to get someone to do what you want.

1)     Find Out What’s Important to Them
Most of us know what’s important to us but we don’t take the time to find out what’s important to the other person. Ask a few questions first about what is important to them, or think about it from their perspective.

2)     Link What You Want to What’s Important to Them
Usually, we just talk about what we want and we don’t link it to anything that the other person might like. What is the link? How can you make a case?

3)     Speak in a Way that is Motivating for Them
For example, if that person is very goal-focused or goal-oriented then you need to tell them what the benefit is (Toward Language).

If they tend to be more problem-focused and the kind of person who notices what is wrong and easily criticizes, tell them what problem will be prevented or solved; what they can move away from.

You can guess if they are in a Toward mode and need a benefit or a goal, or if they are more Away From and prefer to  hear about consequences or negative consequences that they can avoid by doing the thing that you want.

Click here to learn more about influencing and persuasion.

Two more hints about speaking in a way that motivates the other person.
Do they want to have lots of choices and lots of options?  We call that Options Language. Or would they rather have a step-by-step procedure for doing something and talk about how to do something?  We call that Procedures Language.

Think about these 3 easy steps the next time you need to get someone to do what you want.

If you want more tips to solve problems (Away From Alert!) and get what you want (Toward Alert!), visit http://www.ShellesTopTips.com and check out my books and audio programs for yourself at http://www.theshellestore.com

Two Dates and a Couple of Books | NLP


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NLP fans: If you are near London, UK, November 15 to 17, please come and see me at
the NLP Conference. I will be doing 2 experimental demonstrations with Penny Tompkins and James Lawley, the creators of Clean Language, and we don’t know what will happen.  Click here to find out more.In addition Michael Neill is doing a full-day pre-conference workshop and there are so many great sessions by excellent presenters. Hope to see you at the NLP Conference!

Speaker, Trainers, Facilitators & Coaches: The Global Speaking Summit is in Vancouver December  8 to 10, 2013. If you want to take your business global, this is the place to be. Click here for all the information. I’ll be there with bells on! Please come!

And I would like to recommend 2 new books:

The Exceptional Speaker by Alan Stevens and Paul du Toit.

My 2 friends from the Global Speakers Federation cover how to create engaging content, stagecraft, how to work without notes, overcoming nerves and when and how to use props and slides. Check it out here.

Klout Matters by my buddies Terry Brock and Gina Carr. Find out how to measure and enhance your influence in today’s marketplace: the digital world. Excellent reading and very practical. Click here to get a couple of free chapters.

Let me know if you would like me to continue to recommend events and other resources now and then. Shelle@successtrategies.com

I’m feeling bookish, since Canadian short-story author Alice Munro just won the Nobel Prize for literature! She’s a wonderful story teller.

Cheers!

Shelle

p.s.Get your LAB Profile® Practitioner certification from the comfort of your home.
http://www.labprofileonline.com  

LAB Profile® Consultant/Trainer Certification program.Totally NEW Early Reg Package!  Outstanding Savings! Only until Oct 31, 2013
http://www.labprofilecertification.com

Need help with a communication problem at home or at work.
http://www.communicationchallenges.com

Dealing with Upset Customers

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It’s really important to know how to calm down your customer quickly, get to the root of their problem, solve it, and nourish the relationship for next time.

If you’ve had a chance to look at my book, The Customer is Bothering Me, you’ll get this all laid out for you, but there’s four key steps.

1)     Treat the Emotion First
Most people cannot do these two things at the same time; they can’t be upset and be logical. If you’ve got a customer that’s upset and you try immediately to solve their problem, they probably won’t co-operate because they’re busy being upset and they need you to understand that. So treat the emotion first.

The key is to meet your customer where he or she is. My strategy may seem a little silly because most people are taught to stay calm. But if you think about it, when you are upset about something and the person you are speaking to stays calm, and doesn’t acknowledge either verbally or in their tone of voice that you are upset, it can feel like they are not really hearing you.

Instead, I suggest that when your customer becomes upset about something and they raise their tone that you raise your tone to almost the same level, but you say something helpful and we call that getting upset on behalf of your customer.

This is not the same as yelling at your customer. Step number one is to get upset on behalf of your customer, show them that you are surprised and upset with them. If you don’t sound like you’re surprised when they are upset, your customer may believe that this problem is normal, you don’t care, this happens all the time and your whole company doesn’t care about what happens. Remember, everything you do determines what your customer believes about your whole company. So for step one, treat the emotion first.

Click here to find out more about how to match your customer’s tone, and what kinds of things you can say that will be helpful.

2)    Clarify What the Customer Actually Wants and Take Action

Whether or not you agree that it’s a problem, if the customer thinks it is a problem, we need to sort out what it is they need.  You can suggest two options here that will solve their problem. In my book, The Customer is Bothering Me, there is more information on exactly the wording to use with upset customers.

It is important to make a suggestion at this point, as if you ask the customer “How would you like me to fix this?”, they may become angry again since they will be expecting you to be the expert and to know what to do to fix the issue. So step two, clarify what the customer wants and take action.

3)    Make Amends

Many people don’t think about this, but if your customer is upset, to him or her it is as if they have been hurt. So our third step is to make it up to them. It is not enough simply to say, “Well I’m sorry”. Remember when you were a child and your parents told you to say you’re sorry, your siblings knew you weren’t really sorry. Your upset customers know you are not really sorry either. So what can you do to make amends? Does your company have a policy so that the person actually dealing with the upset customers can make amends right on the stop without having to ask for permission?  So step three, make amends.

4)     Nourish the Relationship for the Future
Make sure that you communicate to your customer so that whenever they contact your company again for any reason, that you have set them up for a positive experience. You can do that by saying, “Listen, any one of my colleagues will help you find what you want and if there are ever any issues, we’ll do whatever it takes do to solve it.  We are your personal fix-it people”.  Make sure they can see a picture in their mind’s eye of how it will be next time, (such as “fix-it people”) That’s how to nourish the relationship for next time.

If you want more information on strategies for dealing with customers and creating a great customer experience, check out my book, The Customer is Bothering Me, available as an EBook or available in paperback form.

Hope you enjoyed this. Let me know if you got any great ideas from Shelle’s Top Tips.

Shelle

Click here for more of my blog posts
http://www.theshelleblog.com

Click here for my articles
http://www.shellesarticles.com

Click here to see me in action
http://www.shelleinaction.com
Contact Us:
+1-905-639-6468
melody@wordsthatchangeminds.com

Bullying: Bystanders No More

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In Canada over the last few weeks, we have heard the tragic story of a teenager who committed suicide, after being sexually assaulted and then bullied online for over a year. This isn’t the only story about people suffering at the hands of others while bystanders do nothing, or worse encourage the bullying.

Bystanders are being blamed for not intervening and yet, hardly anywhere in all the literature does it tell bystanders exactly what to do. How many times has each one of us witnessed someone behaving inappropriately and not intervened?

And I just can’t stand it any more! I created this video because I believe there is one thing you can do to stop bullying right when it happens.

If you find the information useful, please share it on your Facebook page or wherever you think people need to see it.

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Cheers,

Shelle

+1-905-639-6468

http://www.labprofileonline.com
http://www.wordsthatchangeminds.com
http://www.theshelleblog.com
http://www.shellestoptips.com
http://www.shellesevents.com
http://www.shelleinaction.com
http://www.shellesarticles.com
http://www.theshellestore.com

 

LAB Profile® Practitioner Opportunity – Live!

Coming up May 23 – 25, 2013 in London may be one of the only remaining opportunities to learn the LAB Profile® Practitioner live with me in English

You see, I will soon be launching the LAB Profile® Online and I’m considering doing a lot fewer of the in-person programs. 

So here’s your chance, not to miss me! And because you are on my email list as a “friend of Shelle”, my host, Robbie Steinhouse of the NLP School and I want to give you another reason to do this program live with me. 

As a friend of Shelle, you will get £200 reduction from the normal price, now only £630 + VAT, instead of £830 + VAT. 

To get this special pricing, please contact Rose Murphy at the NLP School:

+44 207 428 7915 / email info@nlpschool.com
http://www.nlpschool.com

 If you need to be more persuasive, or if your success depends on your communication with others, this is probably the program for you.

Click here to find out more.

 Hope to see you there!

Cheers,
Shelle

p.s. We only have a couple of places left for you to get the special $600 US discount on my 10 day LAB Profile® Consultant/Trainer Certification Program.
Click here for more information.

p.p.s. Have an idea for an upcoming Shelle’s Top Tips? Click here to let me know.

 Check out
www.shellesevents.com

www.shellestoptips.com

www.LABProfileCertification.com

www.Wordsthatchangeminds.com

Saying No To Your Kids

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I know a couple of people, me included, who have difficulty saying no to their children.   

A friend of mine has a daughter who has managed to find ways of getting money from her parents for years. She is in her early 20s now, and still the bank of Ma and Pa is open. Recently, I said no to one of my children who requested something. I then found myself running to my friends and family for support, so I thought maybe it’s time we really think about this. 

Click here to watch the video clip

If you feel that you’ve been the bank of Ma and Pa (that means your bank has been open for them to make withdrawals) one tip I have is to add up how much money you’ve spent on your kids over the last few years. I think you’ll be shocked and I think they’ll be shocked.  

Here’s another tip. When your kids ask you for something usually they just ask you or sometimes they do the big setup where you’re sort of slowly leading to the unending conclusion that you need to lend them some money or give them some money. That’s what happened to me recently.  My suggestion is don’t answer right away. Instead say, “That’s interesting. Tell me more.” And then when they ask you for the money or they ask you for whatever it is they’re going to ask you for, tell them you’ll think about it and get back to them.

I know lots of parents who have to deal with children who are not making their own way. They made terrible financial decisions and then the parents are there to rescue them. I think it’s important to decide when to rescue and when not to rescue, what behaviors are you going to reward and not going to reward. So zoom out. Look at the big picture. How many times has your child stood on their feet, provided for their own needs and made good decisions? And how many times have they not done that and how have you rewarded them? It’s important to figure that out.

So if you find that you’ve been rewarding irresponsible behavior, now is the time to stop. Sit down, plan with your child how they can actually move forward, and tell them what your role is going to be and tell them what you’re not going to do.

But most important of all, when you get hit up for money, just say, “Let me think about it,” and then go and talk to somebody who you know will help you be logical about this.

Our children can certainly pull at our heartstrings and sometimes saying no will really help them grow up.

Cheers,

Shelle

+1-905-639-6468

http://www.wordsthatchangeminds.com
http://www.theshelleblog.com
http://www.shellestoptips.com
http://www.shellesevents.com
http://www.shelleinaction.com
http://www.shellesarticles.com
http://www.theshellestore.com

 

Help!! My presentation is tomorrow!!

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Just mention the word presentation to most people and they will start to get nervous; even just thinking about it. 

Do you have an idea that you know will make a difference but you don’t know how to get it across in the right way and/or the thought of standing in front of an audience makes you sick and shaky?  

For many people this is an experience that causes high stress and anxiety.

BUT

It doesn’t have to be.

Learning how to structure your information and present your ideas in a captivating way will leave you feeling confident and powerful before, during and after your presentation.

I have been presenting to audiences of all sizes all over the world for many, many years and I was the past president of CAPS (The Canadian Association of Professional Speakers).

With my combined expertise in communication and presentation skills I have created 3 MP3s that share with you my proven one-of-a-kind presentation techniques in an easy to learn format that will have your audience entertained and wanting more.   

Save over 30% when you purchase all 3 MP3s together.  ONLY $19.97 US  

CLICK HERE TO GET “THE PERFECT PRESENTATION PACK” NOW!

Click below for more information
http://www.perfectpresentationpack.com

The Perfect Gift for Anyone! Students, co-workers, friends, family.

Still not sure? Feeling a little skeptical?

Click below to view my speaking page
http://www.shelleinaction.com   

How to have a Dynamic Opening to your Presentation - Shelle's Top Tips
How to have a Dynamic Opening to your Presentation – Shelle’s Top Tips

Don’t miss out on my LAB Profile Consultant/Trainer Certification Program 2013

We are offering a $600 US discount PLUS a FREE Group Coaching Session with Shelle after the program to the first 11 registrants – there are only a few spots left

Click here for all the information you need to know

We offer flexible payment options if needed.

If you would like to know how this program will benefit you both personally and professionally I will be happy to speak with you.  Please contact Melody at melody@wordsthatchangeminds.com and she can find a time that is suitable for us both. 

Cheers,

Shelle 

 +1-905-639-6468

http://www.wordsthatchangeminds.com
http://www.theshelleblog.com
http://www.shellestoptips.com
http://www.shellesevents.com
http://www.shelleinaction.com
http://www.shellesarticles.com
http://www.theshellestore.com