Category Archives: Manipulation

How to be Credible – Shelle’s Top Tips

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I created this blog while in San Francisco at the Institute for Advanced Studies in Health Annual Conference. That’s the conference for NLP and Health. It’s been fantastic. 

Here is something that I do not recommend  if you want people to believe what you have to say: being too enthusiastic. When you are too enthusiastic, some people will believe that you are telling them what to think. 

“You’ve got to see this movie, you’ll love it!” That sounds like you are deciding for someone whether or not they will love it. If you want to become more credible, tone down the enthusiasm a little bit.

 Tips

Look and sound confident, as if you believe what you’re saying, but use the “Language of Suggestion”. You could say something such as, “What do you think?” or “In my opinion” or “In my experience.”

 “In my experience” is a great phrase for establishing credibility. Try “In my experience, I find… What do you think?”

If a person uses too many statements of fact, the listener may feel like they are being talked at or told what to do.  That is another hint – I suggest avoiding “should”, “you must” and “here’s what you’ve got to do.” Instead, you may wish to say “It seems to me that…”

If you make a suggestion and invite the other person to think about it. Those are great ways for establishing credibility.

Here is one more way to help you to establish credibility.  Douglas Adams, the wonderful author of “The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy”, in the last book that was removed from his hard drive after his death, said that one can establish credibility by saying, “It turns out.” “Establishing credibility seems to be hard, but it turns out that if you know what you’re doing, it’s pretty easy.”

Those three little words seem to give some kind of credence to your ideas.

Again, the tips on how to be credible: 

  • tone down the enthusiasm,
  • look and sound confident but use the Language of Suggestion
  • invite people to decide for themselves,
  • use phrases such as this “it turns out, in my experience.”

If you want a tried and true process for increasing your credibility, check out my MP3 “Presenting Ideas to Skeptical People”. It’s only $9.97 and could give you the edge next time you need to be convincing. Click here.

Check out  www.ShellesTopTips.com if you would like some tips on communicating and solving some of the problems.

If you are interested in booking me (Shelle Rose Charvet) for a presentation, keynote or workshop contact me at [email protected].  Please visit my speaking page too.

Sales in the New Reality – Shelle’s Top Tips

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Things are not the way they were before. Since 2008 with the financial crash that went around the world, we’ve had disaster after disaster; and nothing will ever Continue reading

Manipulation is Out!

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I just got this question in an email:

My friend is trying to persuade his girlfriend of 4 years to come live with him in Baltimore while he goes to graduate school. Her alternative is getting a masters in art in Austin, Texas, necessitating their break-up. How can he change her mind about this? (Or better yet, how can I?)

Hope you can help.

Here’s what I answered him: Continue reading